Finding Balance

I’m sure there have been a million articles written about how to find balance, yet it still seems to be one thing that everyone is searching for like the holly grail.

For Mums especially, balance is seen as this magical thing that we have to achieve in order to have all aspects of our life running perfectly. Society tells us that we need to make sure to find the perfect balance between work and family, find a way to juggle ALL those balls at the same time without dropping a single one, oh, and keep a perfect house and find time for ourselves too.

It’s a question I get asked a lot as a Single, working Mama of 5 {along with “how do you do it all?“} – “How do you find balance?”

The truth is balance doesn’t look like what we think. Finding balance in our life doesn’t look like a perfectly balanced day, each and every day. Life doesn’t work that way.

I have many tasks to fulfil in my weeks. Raising my kiddos, running a house, working, homeschooling, family, my studies, fitness, friends…… I couldn’t fit all of those things into one day.

I found balance when I stopped thinking about each day and instead looked at a week or even a month. Some days are all about work if I have several deadlines, some days are purely focused on homeschooling, with a little housework fitted in. Obviously, I’m a Mama first and foremost, and raising my kids is a day in, day out task.

I don’t try to fit some of everything into each day, but instead, look at making my weeks balanced. I’ll map out our week on a Sunday, roughly, so we have an idea of what it will look like. I fit in a couple of dedicated homeschooling days, as well as any social time for the kids, some time when I can work, workouts around when I have childcare, and anything else that comes along that week.

There may be weeks when I have extra studies to complete {I’m currently doing a few short courses at Uni ahead of applying to study a degree next year}, and when I have extra work to do for that, other things have to get dropped.

Life is a juggling act, with so many different balls to keep in the air all the time. The key I’ve found is knowing which ones are OK to drop and pick back up when life is less hectic. It’s OK to have periods that are more work-focused, or more kiddo focused, or more you focused. Keep the basics of family life running, and the kiddos fed and hugged and loved, and focus on what is the highest priority in this moment.

Life is a series of seasons, and our focus will change through those seasons. It is allowed to adjust your focus, to not try to have this ‘perfect balance’ between work and home life all of the time. Our days may be unbalanced but if you look at your month, you will see that life balances itself out over a period of time.