Every mother knows that as soon as she has a child, her sense of self-importance shifts and adjusts.
Whereas when you were younger and didn’t have any kids, you might have been more focused on your needs and desires, once you have a baby, they become all-important and you do anything you can to make sure they are happy, healthy and safe.
This is an entirely natural state of affairs. But with years of motherhood, some women do begin to undervalue themselves, always putting what their family needs first and ahead of their own needs and desires. And when that happens, any negative effect in terms of self-esteem and self-belief doesn’t just influence that one person, it also has an impact on the people they love the most. If the anchor of the family feels like she’s come adrift, the rest of the family might not feel so safe and secure either.
If any of this sounds familiar, perhaps it’s time you looked at working on your self-love. Don’t be put off by the phrase, self-love isn’t about being selfish and simply putting yourself first. It’s about remembering that you have needs and many good qualities that should be appreciated. Self-love means being proud of who you are and what you have achieved, as well as being comfortable to be yourself, rather than being the person you think others want you to be.
So how do you go about showing self-love?
Love isn’t just for other people
1. It doesn’t necessarily mean making major shifts in your life, but perhaps you should stop doing the things that you really dislike, if you can, and spend more time doing the things you want to do. If you find your job a grind, for example, maybe now’s the time to start looking for something new and more fulfilling.
2. Another way to show love to oneself is to quit any negative stuff. Don’t put yourself down, saying that you’re no good, or that you’re useless. Act as if you already love yourself, even if you don’t feel like you’re quite there yet. How would you act differently? Would you give yourself a few more treats in life, like booking a weekend away with friends or having a manicure? Try it out and see how it makes you feel.
3. Sometimes it’s hard to place value in yourself. If you struggle with low self-esteem, why not write down some positive affirmations, that you can refer back to whenever negative thoughts creep in. Include your biggest achievements in life and read through your affirmations before you go to sleep at night and when you wake up in the morning.
What will self-love do for you?
Being able to value yourself and nurture yourself will make you feel good, it’ll make you give off a much more positive vibe than when you are down on yourself. And this doesn’t just help you, it will also make a difference for the people around you. They’ll feed off your positive energy and want to spend more time in your company. It’s a win-win situation for you and your family, as well as friends and other acquaintances you have.
Never lose yourself loving someone else Always remember who you are.
— Inspire (@inspirestagram) January 7, 2016
Try adopting a self-love attitude and see how much of a difference it can make to your daily life. You won’t regret it.