Weekend Reflections

Gosh, these weeks seem to fly by so fast don’t they? As much as I enjoyed the slower pace of life back in spring when lockdown was in full force, this is what I like. Kiddos, work, homeschool, studies, friends…. Just sometimes I could do with a couple more hours in my days.

Halfway through my Introduction to Counselling course, and I am loving it. It is hard having a three-hour zoom on a Tuesday evening. It’s a tricky time of day when you have small kiddos, but somehow I am making it work.

It’s really awakened something inside of me, given me a thirst for learning, a fire that wants to build a whole new world. I am full of ideas and plans and hopes and dreams.

I feel alive like I haven’t in years. I feel more like me than ever before. I can see the world opening up in front of me, new opportunities coming my way. Looking back, it’s hard to see how I had let myself become so dulled down. So trampled by life, locked in an unhappy marriage for so long, no confidence, no self-belief. Then so desperate to be loved that I stumbled into an abusive relationship.

Thankfully that woke me up, I escaped and healed. I spent a good year planted, lying dormant, waiting for my roots to grow deep enough to let me bloom.

As I look at forty just around the corner, I feel like I am finally becoming the person I always was, that got crushed and hidden and buried, weighed under other people’s expectations and projected beliefs.

My shackles have been cut, I am on the rise. Life is just beginning for me.